The Golden Acorn Awards--International Ceremony--Opening

:: On a cold, crisp, dark December evening, the New York Metropolitan Opera House is brightly lit. Banners festooned around the entrance proclaim that the grand hall has been reserved for the prestigious first annual Golden Acorn Awards. Katie Courier stands outside, catching spot interviews from the various stars, characters, cast members, and Rangerphiles as they file in::

Katie: Good evening, and welcome to our exclusive coverage of the first annual Golden Acorn Awards! We're looking forward to an outstanding, fantastic, fun-filled night as the best and brightest in Ranger fandom make their appearances to claim these new markers of excellence.

::Katie spots a familiar face in the crowd and rushes over with her cameraman. Gadget Hackwrench, escorted by Chip and Dale, walks along the big red carpet and heads for the main entrance. She’s dressed in her regular coveralls, but she is wearing a pretty amethyst necklace and earrings::

Katie: Gadget! Gadget, a moment of your time!

::Gadget, happy to oblige as always, walks over::

Gadget: Hi there! Swell night, isn’t it?

Katie: It certainly is. Is there anything you’d like to see to the millions of fans watching this ceremony around the world?

::Gadget looks from Katie to the camera and waves::

Gadget: Everything should go great tonight with no pr—

::Chip and Dale cover her mouth at this point::

Chip: You never can be too safe.

::Katie grins, then there is the soft KRUMPH of an explosive charge from above and a shower of concrete dust that makes Gadget and the others flinch. A pair of rappelling ropes drops down the front of the opera house, upon which a pair of squirrels in SWAT uniforms, armed to the teeth, rapidly descend. Gadget cries out in alarm as she recognizes her associates from Dave White’s story, “The Bikini Break”.

Gadget: Gary! Gordon! What are you guys doing!

Gary: We're getting you outta here!

::Gary catches her by the arm while Gordon covers their retreat, to the total confusion of the onlookers::

Gary: We got your message.

Gordon: Sneaky way to put it—‘War Code Anna's Gold’. We figured you were tied up and typing with your tail.

::Gadget stopped the two commandos with one mighty pull as she realized the truth::

Gadget: That's not what I sent! I sent you a reminder, ‘Golden Acorn Awards’!

::Gary stops at the edge of the stage, confused::

Gary: That's not what we got.

::Gadget’s eyelids narrow and her voice takes on an accusatory tone::

Gadget: You didn't shut off your encryption software, did you?

::The two rodents freeze as they realize there were two ways to interpret - or decrypt - the message. Gordon sneaks the stun grenade he’d been holding back into his pocket. Gary follows suit with his pistol::

Gordon: It's the award ceremony?

Gary: That's tonight?

::Gadget points furtively toward Katie, the camera, and the five hundred well-dressed guests who have gathered around::

Gadget: It's NOW!

::The Two Scruffy Guys begin to notice the many curious faces just beyond the glare of the camera lights. Gordon chuckles weakly::

Gordon (embarrassed): Ahhh, hahahaha. Well, leave it to us to make a splashy entrance.

::Gadget cringes, blushing at the awkwardness of it all::

Gadget: And I thought I'd be embarrassed if I had to sing. How do we get out of this?

::Gary waives off her concerns::

Gary: You know us better than that. We prepare for every contingency!

Gordon: Including success.

::The Two Scruffy Guys grab the front of their uniforms and pull them open with the abrupt sound of ripping Velcro. The SWAT gear falls away as the pair steps out in tuxedos that are not only perfectly fitted, they are even wrinkle-free. Gadget stares open-mouthed at the sudden transformation, and Gordon gently bumps Chip aside::

Gordon: If Dirk Suave can do it, we can do it.

::Gadget shakes her head in wonder::

Gadget: I've got to get a better writer.

Gordon: We warned you not to agree to the whole series. It just gets nuttier from here.

Gary (to the crowd): Okay citizens, situation normal! You can go back to your reveling!

::Katie brushes the cement dust off of her designer dress, and tries to compose herself once again::

Katie: That’s it from outside. On to you, Stan..

::The scene switches to the interior of the Met, resplendent in ornate decorations. The many rows of red plush theater seats are beginning to fill up fast in the theater, and a huge golden acorn trophy is visible on the big screen just behind the podium on stage. The scene shifts again as Stan Blather begins his spiel::

Stan: This is Stan Blather, reporting to you live from inside, backstage at the Golden Acorn Awards, where the preparations are in place to start off the ceremonies tonight.

::Stan walks into a crowd of hurrying people, grabbing one of them by the arm. It's a bat in a ten-gallon Texas hat::

Stan: Excuse me, sir. I'd like to get your thoughts on tonight's ceremony. Your name is...?

::The Texas prairie bat gives a war-whoop right in Stan's ear::

Bedivere: YEE-HAW! This is Bedivere Fairmont, the toughest hombre west of anyplace you know! Is that there camera thingy on?

Stan: Uh, yes. It is.

::Bedivere nearly runs over Stan, sticking his face right up to the lens::

Bedivere: Howdy y'all out there in tee-vee land! This heah shindig's gonna be the greatest to-do since the big prairie-dog ropin' contest of '88! Strap down those sets, because it gets wild from here, buckaroos! YEEEE-HAAAW!

::Bedivere slaps Stan on the back, knocking him down, then waves at the camera again before heading off. Stan resettles his toupee on his head before looking for another interviewee::

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::He heads out of the New York sewers, shivering with nervous awe. It is the cloaked form of an alligator, with part of a costume visible from under the cloak as he passes through the harsh light of an alleyway and toward the back of the Metropolitan Opera House::

Euripides: Hey, what's all the shaking for?

::From under his cloak emerge two smaller cloaked figures. They are puppets—one dressed as a toga-wearing ancient Greek, wearing glasses, and the other a dark-haired long-nosed Frenchman in formal dress::

Sewernose: Do you not know what this place is? This is the New York Metropolitan Opera House! All the greats over the years have played here. Do you know what this could mean?

::The alligator raises the French doll up to his face, who promptly takes on a disapproving tone::

Voltaire: That you might sully the place up with your substandard performance?

Sewernose: What? How dare you! I shall neither sully nor stain this revered edifice, but instead shall impart my glory upon its stage, and in exchange shall leave with but a small token parcel of its reputation to my illustrious name, which shall...

::The Greek doll, in the past so supportive of Sewernose’s acting abilities, interrupts him rudely::

Euripides: Ah, put a cork in it and get inside before we miss everything!

::The two small cloaks disappear into the larger one as the shadowy figure darts inside the backstage area unnoticed::

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::A short man in a tattered cloak slinks clumsily across the backstage area, keeping to the shadows and muttering to himself::

Nimnul: Hmmph! Put on an awards show and don’t invite me, eh? I’ll bet they laughed at the thought—they always laugh! GRRrrrr! Well, no more! Tonight, I’ll have the last laugh, and they’ll be crying a river from now until next Tuesday!

::The oddball professor stops, thinking for a moment::

Nimnul: Actually, a river like that could be a good source of cheap power for my lab...ah, details. There’s more important things at hand. Now, to research how to best turn this event to my advantage...

::He moves deeper into the shadows to collect his malicious data::

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Hosts' introduction and International Award for Best Website Maintainer

::Indy and Rennod take the stage while the orchestra plays “From Russia With Love”. Indy is dressed in a tuxedo and his brown felt fedora, while Rennod is dressed in jeans and a dark t-shirt, wearing his trademark sunglasses. The crowd applauds as they approach the podium at the center of the stage, decorated with the Golden Acorn symbol on the front, and everyone settles down::

Indy: Welcome to the Golden Acorn Awards! Rennod and I are your hosts tonight. We’re glad to see such a wonderful turnout, and we know that tonight’s going to be a blast.

::The crowd applauds, then gasps in pleased wonder as stage fireworks go off in a huge bang::

Rennod: See, we told you! Oh, and the reason we used “From Russia With Love” is that we’re opening with the International Awards first and that was the only song we could find sheet music for that even hit in the neighborhood of being Russian.

::A laugh ripples across the audience::

Indy: We’re pleased to welcome our Russian and other international friends who are joining us live from around the world, as well as watching live via satellite! Some of the countries represented in our worldwide community include Canada, Mexico, Great Britain, Russia, Latvia, Norway, the Netherlands, Germany, Australia and Japan!

::Applause breaks out, as a global map shows the countries with active Rangerphiles::

Indy: This ceremony wouldn’t be possible without the help of a lot of people, so let me take a few moments to recognize them. First, I’d like to thank this man right here, who took on much of the burden himself. Rennod handled the nominations and vote-collecting solo, as well as notifying the winners.

Rennod: Hey, glad to help out, you know.

Indy: Then there’s all the people who agreed to be presenters tonight—you’ll find the bulk of the Rangerphile community represented here, as well as fanfiction characters and characters from the majority of the Ranger episodes. Among the Rangerphiles, I’d particularly like to recognize Karl, John Nowak, Painless Doc Johnson, CD, and SomeGhol, who each gave their time for extra presentations to assure everything would be done on time today.

::More applause as the spotlight finds each Rangerphile Indy mentions::

Rennod: Well, you didn’t come to hear us, so let’s get down to business, shall we? We’ve asked a bunch of the characters from the Rescue Rangers show to help us out, so we’ll turn the show over to them now.

::From the announcer’s booth, a bespectacled bat speaks. It’s Dr. Batorious, the kind doctor from “Untold Ranger Tales”. He speaks in his deep and smooth voice, sounding uncannily like James Earl Jones::

Dr. Batorious: And now, the first award of the Golden Acorn Awards, Best Website Maintainer…

::The stage shakes with the weight of an elephant stomping it, entering from stage left. It’s Colonel Captain, the leader of the elephants from the episode “An Elephant Never Suspects”. The big pachyderm settles in front of the podium and one of the zoo monkeys comes out and adjusts the microphone for him. Behind him the big screen displays the words, “Best Website Maintainer” in large print. The elephant speaks, with a gruff but proper military tone::

Colonel: Ah yes, very good. At ease, everyone!

::The crowd salutes, and sits down—oh yes, they’d been standing because the Colonel had shaken them out of their seats::

Colonel: Now, no chicanery while I’m on duty. I’m here to deliver this Golden Acorn Award for Best Website Maintainer, and I intend to see that discipline is maintained! Very good, to the nominees then…

CD
Rem
Ruslan

::The monkey opens the envelope with the winner’s name in it, handed to him by a trusty stage hand, and holds it up for the elephant to read::

Colonel: Yes now, let’s see…by thunder, they could make this print easier to read!

::Colonel Captain stomps in emphasis, shaking the entire stage. The monkey saves the golden trophy on the podium from falling::

Colonel: Ah, now I have it. The winner is Ruslan!

::The audience applauds, and from stage left comes Chip, who opens a piece of paper as he reaches the podium::

Chip: Ruslan couldn’t be here with us tonight—his plane was snowbound at the airport—so I’m accepting this award on his behalf. Ruslan said to say it is a great honor to be chosen and he’ll try to remember not to use it as a doorstop…

::Chip looks up and chuckles a little, then takes the award. Colonel Captain and the monkey head off with him, shaking the stage once again::

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International Award for Best English-Accessible Website

::The band starts up the “Coo Coo Cola” theme song and a rat wearing a red tunic with a thimble fez on his head and carrying a staff with a bottle cap on it walks across the stage. The audience shouts, “Come along! You belong! Feel the fizz!” Yes, it’s Pop Top, leader of the now-defunct Cola Cult::

Top Pop: Thank you, you’re too kind! The Cola Cult may be gone, but it’s always nice to belong somewhere. And right here, with all you kind people, I know that I truly belong.

::The crowd applauds in response::

Pop Top: And now, on to the nominees for the Best English-Accessible Website:

Dale's Rescue Ranger Page, by Chris "Dale" Birkett
Disneyania, by Johan Rhen
Nathan's pages, by Nathan aka "Teargas"
Ranger Roadhouse, by CD
Rem's Furry Page, by Rem
Ruslan's CDRR Project Group, by Ruslan
Russian CDRR Portal, by Ruslan
White Mouse Lab, by Murad Ismailov

Pop Top: So many good places for people to belong…and now the winner.

::Pop Top opens the envelope::

Pop Top: Suffering sodas! Four sites are tied for first! Disneyania, by Johan Rhen, Ruslan's CDRR Project Group, by Ruslan, Russian CDRR Portal, by Ruslan, and White Mouse Lab, by Murad Ismailov. It’s a good thing they made up all those extra trophies…

Pop Top: Ruslan and Murad are both snowbound, but I understand they both appreciate this award. Johan’s not with us tonight either, but he did send along this videotaped acceptance…

::The lights dim and in a moment Johan’s face appears on the big screen::

Johan: This award has a special meaning for me, since it is actually the only award I have won in competition. And I didn't even vote for myself on this one! Guess there's at least one person out there who really likes my website!

::The audience laughs accordingly::

Johan: I want to thank you all for your friendliness, but I also find it highly appropriate to give some special thanks to some of the Rangerphiles that are present at this ceremony (or at least I guess they are). So, from the deepest parts of my heart - in other words those normally reserved for Gadget-adoration - huge thanks to Julie, Aivars, CD and Dale (the Chris B. one, not the furry one) for their helpfulness and generosity with different things, knowledge, and time-consuming efforts. Without your help, my website would have been much less interesting.

::The picture on the screen fades as Johan waves, and the crowd applauds::

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International Award for Best Non-English Website

::The orchestra plays “Walk Like an Egyptian” and a mummy comes out on stage, bandages and all. It’s Hiram, the mummy with a really bad sleeping disorder from “Throw Mummy From the Train”. The mummy walks (okay, it was a bad pun) and makes it to the podium::

Hiram: Hello, everyone! It wasn’t easy getting here from Inkadinkadoo, but for the Rangers I decided that I could interrupt my eternal rest and present one of the awards for the ceremony. Do you know how embarrassing it is being sent as postal freight?

::The audience laughs as Hiram turns around, showing the postal marks on his bandaged bank, then he turns back around::

Hiram: At least they did send me airmail. Well, enough about that. Here’s tonight’s nominees for Best Non-English Website:

Best Web Site (Non-English)

Aivars Liepa's home page, by Aivars "Artist" Liepa – Latvian
Russian CDRR Portal, by Ruslan – Russian

::Hiram pulls out an ancient flute and begins playing. Mysteriously, a rope floats through the air, with the award envelope tied to the end of it. The rope politely puts the envelope down on the podium, generating reactions of awe and amazement::

Hiram: Hey, when you’ve got a few thousand years to kill on the job, you can learn some pretty nifty things!

::The audience claps and laughs, and Hiram opens the envelope::

Hiram: And the winner is Ruslan, for the Russian CDRR Portal!

::Hiram takes a piece of paper out of the envelope::

Hiram: Oh, that’s right—Ruslan isn’t here tonight. Well, I’ll be glad to drop off this trophy and any others he wins. I have some relatives up his way I’d like to visit before going home. Congratulations, Ruslan!

::Hiram waves to the camera, then the crowd applauds and the mummy takes the trophy and heads off-stage::

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International Award for Best Portrait

Dr. Batorious (announcing): To present the award for Best Portrait, we have Mr. Dumpty, the egg-loving villain from “Three Men and a Booby”!

::Mr. Dumpty comes out, followed closely by his butler. The egg-shaped human smiles and waves to the audience, then heads to the podium—which is too tall for him. Dumpty whistles and gestures to his butler, who promptly brings a stepladder. Dumpty climbs up, and his oval face pops up over the podium::

Dumpty: Hello, everyone! I hope you’re having an egg-static time tonight…

::Dumpty waits for the laugh, but gets none, so he continues::

Dumpty: I am here to give the award for Best Portrait. Why didn’t someone do a portrait of an egg! They’re so perfect, so wonderfully balanced! Why, I have fifty-seven paintings of eggs in my house alone. The portrait of the red ibis’ egg alone is worth—

::The butler clears his throat, and reminds Mr. Dumpty of why he’s here::

Dumpty: Oh yes. I could talk on eggs all night, but down to the yolk of things. Here are the nominees:

Alone, by Ilya Pestov
Gadget in Captivity at Fat Cat, by Loki, from an Illustration to "Small Spring Adventure"

::Mr Dumpty receives the envelope, which he promptly opens with an egg-shaped letter opener::

Dumpty: And the winner is Alone, by Ilya Pestov!

::Gadget returns to the stage and the podium::

Gadget: Wow, two in a row! Ilya said to say thanks and now he’ll have some great acorn-shaped bookends!::

::Gadget waves to everyone and Mr. Dumpty walks off alongside Gadget, wondering if there are any good egg-shaped trophies around::

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International Award for Best B&W Grayscale

::From behind the curtain, the audience can hear someone muttering, trying desperately to get through. Finally, the person gives up and lifts the bottom of the curtain. It’s Shaka-Baka, the rather dull-witted but loveable surfer bum from “Gadget Goes Hawaiian”. He walks to the podium and just stands there for a moment or two::

Indy (from off-stage): Your lines!

Shaka-Baka: Oh yeah. Uh, howdy there, dudes and dudettes! Hey, wild ceremony so far, huh? Well, the Indymeister and the Rennodinator asked me to fly in and present the next gnarly award, which is…uh…

Indy: Best Black and White Grayscale Image!

Shaka-Baka: Uh, right. What he said.

::Some of the audience members laugh, and Lahwhinie can be distinctly heard saying, “He’s a nitwit, but a cute nitwit”::

Shaka-Baka: So anyway, here are the ones up for this bodacious award:

Cage, by Ilya Pestov
gadfavanimeB.jpg, by Nathan aka "Teargas"
Gadget in captivity at Fat Cat, by Loki, found at Illustration to "Small Spring Adventure"

::Shaka-Baka looks back at the list he just read from::

Shaka-Baka: What’s a ‘gadfavanimeB.jpg’, anyhow? Hey, whatever it is, it won! Oops—I mean, the winner is Nathan for his boss pic!

::Nathan comes out, unsure of just what to do. Shaka-Baka pulls him up the podium, gives him a high-five and hands him his award::

Nathan: Thank you kindly, I'm very pleased to accept the award for grayscale image. Grayscale pics make up the majority of my body of work. I've always thought that a sketch can, occasionally, carry a certain "life" that an image that’s been put through the computer-colouring process often lacks. I hope people within, and without, the community enjoy the winning grayscale image, and the other images at my page (http://www.rrstuff.net/~nateartpage).

::With that, Nathan nods and heads off. Shaka-Baka goes off with him, wondering just how long it would take before he could get to the nearest beach::

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International Award for Best B&W Line Art

::Onto the stage walks a casually-dressed human, wearing a fedora and a gun. Nope, it’s not Indy—it’s Detective Drake, the police detective from “To the Rescue”. The veteran gumshoe takes the podium::

Drake: Hey, folks. I decided to beat it up here and do a stint on-stage. Me and Plato are doing fine. In fact, I think he’s going to be presenting in a little while here. Best Black and White Line Art, huh? I know they were giggling back there for some reason. For you international folks, a police car’s known as a “black and white” in America. Okay, let’s see what we got here…

::Drake puts on a pair of spectacles, a bit embarrassed at the necessity::

Drake: The nominees for the Best Line Art award are:

The Cover to "The Rustles in Darkness", by Loki (Gloohov)
"Hello, Chipper!", by Loki, found at Illustration to part three of "Excursion with Gadget"
Night Gadget Illustration, by Loki, found at Illustration to part three of "Excursion with Gadget"

Drake: Now, let’s see who gets the golden acorn here…oh, it’s Loki, for "Hello, Chipper!"! Come on up, pal!

::Instead of Loki, it’s Monty who comes up::

Monty: Loki’s right sorry he couldn’t make this ‘ere shindig, but the bloke telephoned from the airport and said that receiving all the nominations was a mighty big honor in itself. He says thanks to everyone who voted and he hopes all the Russian members win something. Thanks!

::The crowd applauds and Monty takes the trophy off with him. Detective Drake waves and walks off behind him::

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International Award for Best Color Image (Rendered)

::As the orchestra plays “Hello Dolly”, Canina La Fur, star of stage, screen and an occasional dog food commercial, trots onto the stage, escorted by Monterey Jack. She’s dressed in her pink outfit that she wore in the episodes “A Chorus Crime” and “They Shoot Dogs, Don’t They?” She blows kisses to the crowd, then heads to the podium::

Canina: Oh, thank you, thank you! It’s so good to see all your charming faces again. Isn’t that right, Montgomery?

Monty: Monterey…

Canina: Right. I just got through filming my new movie, “Die Another Dog Day”, with Pierce Boxernan. Oh, what a charmer that canine is! Why when I got there, he—

Monty: Lass, don’t ya think you should get on with the presenting…

Canina: Of course, Mortimer.

Monty: Monterey!

Canina: Right. Now, I’m here to present the award for Best Colored Image (Rendered). Oh, thank heavens for color! I remember when I did “Casabarka”, way back in…well, nevermind how long ago.

Monty: Oh, that’s one of my favorites! That takes me back years, and years, and years…

Canina: How sweet…

Monty And years…

Canina: Nice of you to…

Monty: And YEARS…

Canina: Let’s get on with the presentation, Morgan!

::Monty smiles and winks to the audience::

Canina: Okay, the nominees for this prestigious award are:

Alone, by Ilya Pestov
Comic, by Ilya Pestov
Foxydale, by TOZ
Gadget_New_Millenium, by Alexey Kobyshev

Canina: Now, let’s see who won…oh, heavens! It’s TOZ, for Foxydale! Isn’t that wonderful?

::This time, it’s Dale who comes out::

Dale: Getting the idea that the snow pretty much ground ‘em all, folks? Gadget said the line at the airport telephone was as long as Nimnul’s rep sheet!

::The audience nods and chuckles, then Dale continues, opening a piece of paper::

Dale: Well, TOZ says that he’s really glad that Foxydale was chosen. It’s one of his favorites and to be chosen over such worthy competition makes it all the sweeter. Speaking of sweeter, anyone know where the dessert line is at the buffet?

::Chip does a dope slap in the audience as one of the stagehands comes up and tells Dale::

Dale: Oh, thanks! I’ll keep your award safe, TOZ, but uh, it might be a little sticky…

::The crowd applauds and Dale heads off for the buffet::

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International Award for Best Colored Image (Flat)

::A young red-haired teenage squirrel walks out on stage, wearing a sparkling blue dress that matches her eyes. Some of the young men whistle at her and she stops and waves back, grinning, then remembers that she’s supposed to be giving out an award and starts to run but trips. However, she recovers before falling on her face and with a blush heads over to the podium. Yes, it’s Tammy from “Adventures in Squirrelsitting”::

Tammy: Hi there! Oh, I’m so happy to get to be in on this award stuff! Hiya, Chipper!

::Tammy waves and winks to Chip in the audience, who blushes. Dale pokes Chip in the ribs, and Chip takes off his hat and starts whacking the laughing munk next to him with it while Gadget laughs on Chip’s other side::

Tammy: Okay, the award for Best Colored Image (Flat) is next. I love pictures! I’ve got dozen of pictures of Chipper posted all around my room! Doesn’t he have the cutest nose?

::Chip sinks a little lower into his chair amid the chuckles, and from offstage Indy reminds Tammy of what she’s supposed to be doing::

Tammy: All right, here’s the nominees:

Gadget Armygirl, by Murad Ismailov
Gadget_New_Millenium, by Alexey Kobyshev
Illustration to Winner of Princesses, by Nort
Sunrise, by Ilya Pestov

Tammy: I wish Gadget would go into the army, then Chipper would be…oh, sorry. Uh, let’s see who won!

::Tammy rips open the envelope::

Tammy: And the winner is Alexey Kobyshev, for Gadget_New_Millennium!

::The crowd applauds, then Tammy pulls out a piece of paper::

Tammy: Alexey said that the phone charges at the airport are criminal…oh, and he said he’s grateful for the award. He thought that Murad or Nort would’ve won it for sure. He says thanks to everyone who voted for him, and hopes the ceremony’s fun!

::Tammy blows kisses to the crowd and heads off with the trophy::

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International Award for Best Artist

Dr. Batorious (announcing): And to present the award for Best Artist, we have Steggy, the intelligent miniature dinosaur from “Prehysterical Pet”!

::Steggy flies onto the stage in his egg-shaped ship and lands ride beside the podium. A hatch opens on the side of the egg ship and Steggy jumps out and waves, to the applause of the audience. Then one of then runs onto the stage with him::

Mr. Dumpty: That ship! I MUST HAVE THAT SHIP! It is so egg-squisite!

::Guards rush up on the stage and haul Mr. Dumpty off, and Steggy goes to the podium::

Steggy: I really want to thank you all for inviting me to come here tonight. It’s a long way from my planet, but when I heard that I’d get to see my friends the Rescue Rangers plus their fans I couldn’t stay away! We have nothing like this award ceremony on my planet—all we give to deserving people are big stone plaques with their names carved on them. And most folks don’t want them, because they weigh a ton—literally.

::Steggy chuckles a bit with audience, then continues::

Steggy: So, tonight I present you the nominees for Best Artist. We have lots of great artists on our world. Of course, mainly they like to paint food because it’s what we think about most. The nominees are:

Artist
Ilya Pestov
Loki (Gloohov)
Murad Ismailov
Nathan aka "Teargas"
Nort
Rem
Ruslan Matvienko
TOZ

::Steggy opens the envelope::

Steggy: We’ve got a three-way tie! Your winners for Best Artist are Loki Gloohov, Murad Ismailov, and Ruslan Matvienko!

::The three trophies are brought out and Steggy pulls out a piece of paper::

Steggy: The guys were all really happy to win this award. They said it made up for the terrible commissary food at the airport—what’s a commissary…oh well. They said that sharing the award shows the high regard with which all the Rangerphiles hold the Russian artists, and they were all pleased to be best artist.

::Steggy gets in his ship and flies off, as one of the stagehands takes the trophies off to be shipped to the respective winners::

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International Award for Best Artwork

::A nightingale begins to sing, and the bird flies onto the stage accompanied by a human in Oriental garb. It is Chirp-Sing and the emperor Dim-Sun. Dim-Sun walks behind the podium and Chirp-Sing lands on top of it::

Chirp-Sing: We are extremely honored to be your presenters tonight for one of the awards in this honorable ceremony.

Dim-Sun: Yes! We were glad to come here and be part of this, though I still miss my sister, even if she was evil and deceptive.

::Chirp-Sing lights on Dim-Sun’s shoulder and pats him comfortingly::

Chirp-Sing: It is our noble privilege to present the nominees for Best Artwork:

findyou-bw_rm.gif, by Ruslan Matvienko, found at Internet Gadget Archive
gadfavanimeB.jpg, by Nathan aka "Teargas"
Gadget Armygirl, by Murad Ismailov
Illustration to “Winner of Princesses”, by Nort
“It's My Life” music video, by Koyot
simple_rm.jpg, by Ruslan Matvienko, found at Internet Gadget Archive

::Dim-Sun tears open the envelope and Chirp-Sing bends his neck to see who won::

Chirp-Sing: The best artwork is by Koyot, for the “It’s My Life” music video!

::The crowd applauds and Dim Sun takes out a piece of paper::

Dim Sun: Koyot most humbly regrets not being here tonight, but he sends holiday greetings from the airport and wishes everyone well. He is most humbly thankful for this high award, and the honor bestowed him.

::The crowd applauds, and Dim Sun bows and leaves the stage. The announcer comes on over the P.A. system::

Dr. Batorious: It’s time for a break—when the Golden Acorn Awards returns, we’ll have the awards for the written categories in the International awards, including Best Original Male and Female Characters! Stay tuned…

Proceed to Part 2