Best Use of A Recurring Series Character

 

::There is the sudden sound of bagpipes as a lively Highland march begins to play. The curtains part, and Reguba walks onto the stage, resplendent in his kilt and regalia::

 

Reguba: Greetings, my good friends! On behalf of the Rescue Rangers, and all of the assembled staff of this good Acorn Cafe, I bid thee welcome!

 

::He consults his notes for a moment and then stuffs them unceremoniously into a pocket::

 

Reguba: Ahhh, it is good to be in such a fine city! I must admit, it puts me in mind of our own London, in a great many ways. Full of life, zest, and color!

 

::He breathes in deeply, making a pleased noise, and returns his attention to the crowd::

 

Reguba: You know, this ceremony reminds me of a thing that happened long ago, when I was a young squirrel. It all began in the backwoods near Redwall Abbey, one bright and sunny afternoon...the bells of Martin and Matthias were ringing the lunch hour, I believe. I had stumbled upon--

 

Chip: [i]Ahem![/i]

 

::The chipmunk's cough cuts the warrior off in mid-sentence, and the leader of the Rangers consults his watch pointedly. Reguba frowns and checks his own::

 

Reguba: What? Am I that long-winded? I hadn't even started the main body of my thought yet!

 

Chip: I know, and that's the idea! Now, if you don't mind...the envelope, please?

 

Reguba: Oh...of course. Blast, and I had been saving that tale for just such an occasion. Anyhow...

 

::He clears his throat, and opens the envelope in his hands::

 

Reguba: Ladies and gentlemen, the nominees for Best Use of a Recurring Series Character are as follows...

 

Loneheart, for Gadget in “Gadget in Chains”

 

BOC42, for Gadget in “Closer than a Brother”

 

UrthQuake, for Dale in “The Lost Rangers”

 

Stainless Steel Rat, for Monty in “On a Wingnut and a Prayer”

 

Dave White, for Gadget in “May Day Mayday”

 

Reguba: And now, it is my great pleasure to announce, that the winner is...two winners! Loneheart for "Gadget in Chains" and BOC42 for "Closer Than a Brother"! Would Gadget join us as well, since she's the character of honor for both?

 

::The band strikes up to the tune of "Cooler Than The Red Dress" and Gadget walks up to the podium wearing her famous little red dress, a huge smile and a schoolgirl blush::

 

Gadget: Golly, I don't know what to say, which I guess is kind of fortunate because I do have reputation for saying far too much, which is ironic really when you consider that Loneheart, who is also getting this award in a way, also has a habit of going into far too much detail when he's writing stories so I guess between the two of us it's not really much of a surprise that "Gadget in Chains" ended up being so long by the time he finally finished writing it…

 

::Gadget pauses to take a breath and remembers why she started talking in the first place::

 

Gadget: Oh, thank you everyone who voted for me to get this award and to everyone who read the story, even if you were only reading it because of all the terrible things Loneheart kept doing to me, which is a little depraved when you really think about it which I can't help doing because I think about so much.

 

::Gadget breaks off and looks serious for a moment::

 

Gadget: Actually this story gave people a lot to think about, including me. And it gave us plenty of time to think too! It took Loneheart roughly seven years to write "Gadget in Chains", which is a long time to wait in a cell for the next script installment, I can tell you!

 

::Laughter::

 

Gadget: I've collected a lot of awards for other people and won a few myself over the years, but this is one I really think I've earned. Thanks, everybody!

 

::The audience applauds as Gadget holds up her award. BOC42 blushes and rises from her seat, hugging Gadget as she reaches the stage::

 

Boxy: Wow, you guys.  This was one award I seriously wasn’t expecting.  It blew me away when I saw that I was nominated for it, because it never even crossed my mind.  I have to tell you – there was one major road block in writing Closer Than a Brother, and that was writing it in first person.  I could be wrong, but I’ve never seen a Ranger fic done this way before.  When Silver Shadow started beta reading for me, the first thing he said was, “It’s in first person.”  “Yeah,” I said, “that’s why it took me so long to write

 

::Boxy takes a deep breath and leans onto the podium a bit, looking over at Gadget::

 

Boxy: It was a really tricky process, and I’m still certain I didn’t do it all right.  Gadget is a pretty sunny, happy person, and in fanfics she usually gets dragged through the wringer.  I wanted to find a fairly happy medium between the two, if it was at all possible.  And at any rate, if we follow my English professor’s definition, any story that ends with marriages and celebrations is a comedy.  I find that somewhat ironic.

 

::The audience chuckles and rolls their eyes::

 

Boxy: It was pretty amazing at times to write this story, especially the last chapter.  I think I went through three different versions before Gadget finally showed up and put her stamp of approval on it.  She’s taught me a lot, which I hope to be able to use in future stories, and maybe next time, I’ll get more right.

 

::Gadget smiles back at Boxy::

 

Boxy: Again, thank you all for reading and voting, and I’ll see you at the after parties!

 

::Reguba congratulates Boxy and Loneheart and heads off the stage, playing "High Road to Gairloch" on the pipes as he goes::