[u]Best Website[/u]

 

::From offstage, dark, mysterious music begins to play, evoking images of gangsters and gun-molls, hard-boiled detectives and crusty beat cops. After a moment, the house lights come up, and Almondine Maplewood steps onto the stage, dressed in a recreation of her original blue silk, strapless gown from “The Purloined Playboy”::

 

Alma: You people have no idea how expensive it is to get a good evenin' dress tailored, this decade. I'll be good an' happy to get back to my office in the 30's, when this is all over.

 

::She smiles brightly, dazzling the cameras which have begun to flash::

 

Alma: Buuut...since we're all here, I might as well just be gracious, see? Now then, where's those two boys with that envelope?

 

::Chip and Dale suddenly tumble onstage, embroiled in the middle of some quite...physical argument. Alma falls silent and crosses her arms, tapping her foot in simulated patience. After a moment, she looks out at the audience::

 

Alma: Will you'se ladies and gents excuse me for just a minute?

 

::She leaves the podium and wades into the small dust cloud, jerking the two chipmunks up by their ears::

 

Chip and Dale: Owww!

 

Alma: Now then, are ya goin' to be good kids, and no more of this lousy fightin'?

 

Chip and Dale: Yes ma'am!

 

Alma: Good. Now gimme.

 

::She takes the envelope from Dale's pocket and sashays back to the lectern, giving the crowd an apologetic grin::

Alma: Now then, where were we? Oh yeah. Th' nominees for best website! And here they are:

 

The Acorn Cafe

 

The Russian CDRR Portal

 

Tanka's CDRR Pages

 

The Ranger Wiki

 

CDRR Headquarters

 

Rescue Rangers HQ

 

WAM!

 

Toni's World of Stuff

 

Jonesscientific

 

Alma: An' with no further ado, the winner is...your own Acorn Café!

 

::Indy comes up on stage::

 

Indy: Special thanks go our to our website host Stephen Clouse who couldn't be here tonight. This is in truth your award, not mine or any of the other moderators. The heart and soul of the Café are the Rangerphiles. You are what makes it unique and special, and every one of you is a special person, make no mistake about it. Thank you all, very much.

 

::Once the applause dies down, Alma waits until Indy leaves then walks toward stage left. Chip and Dale are there to meet her::

Chip: Uh, sorry about all that.

 

Dale: Yeah, we were just havin' a difference of opinion.

 

Alma: Oh, and what about?

 

Chip: Who was going to get to take you to the post-awards dinner.

 

Alma: You're cute, toots, but don't give yourself airs. I'm ready to get back home.

 

::Alma disappears in a blink of light::


Dale: Awww! We lose more dates that way!