::A scream comes from behind the curtain, and the audience hears some say, “What did you bring that here for!”. A moment later, something heavy hits the floor, then the same voice says, “what about the rest of youse?” A lot of heavy things hit the floor after that. Then a trio of presenters emerges onto the stage. Rat Capone leads the way, followed by Arnold Mouseneggar and Sugar Ray Lizard. Some scattered boos (led mainly by Dale) echo throughout the place. Rat growls at him and Dale smiles and waves back::


Rat Capone: Listen up, youse! We three are in the road to rehabilitation, so we don’t want to have to resort to anything physical to get our point across tonight. That’s why I insisted my associates here discard their, er, accessories in case the coppers, er, members of the local law enforcement happened to be watching.


Arnold: Yeah, and besides once this is over, we’re going to—


Rat: Shaddap!


Arnold: Oh yeah, I forgot we weren’t supposed to tell about the bank and all.


::Rat gives the audience an alligator smile. Everyone’s crossed their arms in suspicion by this point::


Rat: Uh, heh, heh. Don’t mind him, folks. He’s just a little dim-witted is all.


::Rat mutters under his breath, “and very dead-witted when I get through with him”::


Rat: Anyways, we are here to tell youse about who win this here award for Best Character Interaction. The lucky stiffs, uh nominees, are:


Chip & Dale's heated argument, by The J.A.M., from “Death of a Comedian”, chapter tessares Dale & Foxy's "joint hallucination" scene, by The J.A.M., from “Death of a Comedian”

Foxy sings "Total Eclipse of the Heart", by The J.A.M., from “Death of a Comedian”


::At this point, a few audience members begin chanting, “Mexico!!!” in eager anticipation::




::The audience quiets down, but there are already members of the local police force getting ready::


Rat: And the guy who gets the trophy is The J.A.M., for Chip and Dale’s heated argument!



¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!!


::As Chris Silva, Chip, Dale, and The J.A.M. bound down to the stage, the band plays “Little Girl”::


Dale: Zowie, J.A.M.!! That’s five awards in a row—!! Huh?


::Rat Capone gives them a broom::


Chip: And it looks like a clean sweep, too.


Dale: But what do we do with this?


::The Detective smirked at him::


Chip: I don’t know. Clean *your* side of the room, maybe?


Dale: Or we could have it bronzed for posterity!


::The audience laughs at that comment::


Chip: Let’s just finish this, okay, Dale?


::Chip pushes Dale aside and lets the jaguar speak again::


J.A.M.: Well, interaction involves knowing your characters, and keeping a *very* close track of what they say and the subtle body movements they do, especially in heated arguments such as they one in the story. Thanks to everyone who voted for us, and once again I’d like to thank most of all Christopher Silva, the *original* author of ‘Dale’s’ Lament’, which I took and adapted to my story. Any words, Chris?”


Chris: MEXICO!


::The four take their awards, give an elegant bow, and leave the stage::


ALL: ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO…!!!”


::Rat Capone and his men start heading off stage right when the police nab them. Another one brings all the weapons they’d stolen in his arms and Arnold waves bye-bye to the audience::

Arnold: See you in twenty years or so!


…something stirs….