Outstanding Website Achievement

::The house lights go down again, and as the curtains of the Walt Disney Theater open a jungle scene is revealed. It buzzes with insect life, and the calls of various creatures echo throughout the theater. Salazar Ovid Spumoni creeps in from stage left, wearing a pith helmet and khakis::

Spumoni: Today, we are hunting a most elusive creature indeed. One that has shown much adaptability.

::Spumoni lifts some binoculars to his eyes. As he does so he begins looking around himself and odd creatures begin emerging around him…ones that look remarkably like various models and types of computer displays!::

Spumoni: The [i]Rangerfani sitian[/i], more commonly known as the Rescue Ranger Fan Site, shows remarkable variation within the specie.

::Spumoni motions to the crowd::

Spumoni: The creature has evolved from simple lists and text blocks into something quite resplendent to see…

::Spumoni motions to where one of the displays had been…but immediately realizes that it is not there any more. He is alarmed, and begins looking around for it. As he does so the displays scamper all around through the jungle, eliciting giggles from the crowd::

Spumoni: Here we see several of the prime examples of the specie.

::Spumoni scampers a bit, trying to catch up to the running and jumping monitors that frolic across the dense vegetation, chortling and braying at him as they cavort. He points up a large tree to where one hides in the branches::

Spumoni: Here we see the Rescue Ranger Database making its nest! Note the thoroughness with which it sorts the items it has collected…

::Behind him there is a cooing, and Spumoni sinks to the ground. He crawls along the artificial ground to a part of the stage where a stream runs down a sort of waterfall::

Spumoni: Ah, here we see two Russian variants on the specie, the Russian CDRRHQ and the Russian CDRR Portal gathering up the sustenance specific to their kind…

::Spumoni watches for a moment. As he does two more computer monitors fly down, these displaying two more homepages::

Spumoni: Magnificent! Two more members of the specie, Chip N’ Dale Online and The Acorn Café (this one in 10th Anniversary plumage) have joined the others. Remarkable examples each!

::A short burst of bird-like singing is heard…and Spumoni looks to a nearby fallen tree where two more computer displays are seen to be chirping in communication::

Spumoni: Look, here we see Electric Fish Music (more commonly known as the “Of Mice and Mayhem Site” variant on the specie) in some sort of communication with Matt Plotecher’s site. Amazing how life-like they are!

::At once something catches Spumoni’s eye. He zips to a nearby hole where another computer monitor has been eyeing him. He just misses it as it dives down the hole. Snapping his fingers, he gazes back at the audience. When he does so the monitor pops up and blows a raspberry at him::

::At once Spumoni launches himself down the hole after the monitor, his pith helmet falling off in the tussle. As he drags it back to the surface it fights him and he’s made to call to the audience over the din of the monitor and the other creatures of the jungle calling out in support of the creature::

::Finally, though, Spumoni is victorious and he holds it up::

Spumoni: Here we see a superb, and feisty, example of the variant Tanka’s Website. Yes, like all the rest of the [i]Rangerfani sitian’s[/i] we’ve encountered it is gorgeous and robust, alive and vibrant. The specie is not very common, but they are strong and excellent to see. The members of the Rescue Ranger Fan site specie are all magnificent, are all the product of great time and effort, and are all…

::Everything in the jungle goes quiet::

::Spumoni looks around himself to see that all the monitors, their fan sites still evident, have surrounded him. They are all looking at the last example, held struggling in Spumoni’s paws::

Spumoni: …are all about to attack me viciously.

::He slowly puts his pith helmet back on and lowers Tanka’s Site to the ground. As he pats it on the head the other monitors begin to growl then attack him viciously, as predicted::

::Spumoni fights his way out of the din, crawling out and being pulled back into the dust cloud over and over, looking slightly worse for wear each time::

Spumoni: We certainly appreciate each of these members of the Ranger Fan Site specie, but we must certainly note [one] in particular! Yes, we all look at [one] with a certain amount of awe.

::Spumoni crawls up a nearby jungle tree. He looks down at the monitors that keep snapping at him::

Spumoni: We certainly show our respect for this particular member of the specie, one that is simply outstanding. Yes, I speak of none other than…

[A] monitor leaps up and grabs hold of his tail! It’s the Acorn Café, for its tenth anniversary in service!!

::The crowd cheers::

Spumoni: Youch! Yes, it’s the Acorn Cafe that stands out among the pack! Look at that fine composition! Look at that ease of use! Look at those teeth!”

::As the curtain begins to close and Indy comes to the stage we see Spumoni fighting off the winning site, calling “Down, down!” as he begins to slip from the tree::

Indy: Watch out, Spu. The Café has claws.

::Chuckles ripple throughout the audience as Indy goes to the podium. A sober silence ensues as he looks out upon the crowd::

Indy: Ten short years ago, an idea formed in the mind of a young teenage girl, and none of us have been the same since.

::The main screen shows a picture of Natasha Kashefipour, at which the whole audience stands and applauds::

Indy: Tasha has long since left us to follow her own star, but the legacy she left us lives on. As Chancellor of the Capitol, I’ve presided over more sheer wonder—excuse the pun—than I ever thought I would when I first came to this unique community.

::Indy looks at faces he’s known for years, and those he’s getting to know::

Indy: There’s something about a community that has a life of its own. Not every community makes it, and there were times when I had my concerns about this one. But I think that what many have said is quite true—this is home, and for many of us the Café has become as important as any family we might have.

We’re a rare thing in this uncertain world, an oasis of goodnaturedness, a lighthouse guiding those in the outer darkness, a sanctuary for something that’s good and bigger than any one Rangerphile among us.

::Indy pauses, sizing up his final thoughts::

Indy: Whatever else may happen to us all, we can look upon this moment with a great sense of satisfaction. We have persevered, we have grown, and we have thrived. Every Rangerphile—with us or not with us, living or not--who gives of themselves to that end takes with them a share of this award. Thank you, and bless you all.

::The crowd applauds as Indy leaves the stage. Spumoni leaves as well, running to escape the ferocity of the Café:::