Best poet
Asides=black
bock's comments=red
Foxglove’s
comments=blue
::(backstage) bock's, somewhat out of breath from pushing his
car off stage, catches his wind as the previous winner delivers their
acceptance speech. Foxglove walks up to the Bearcat::
[color=#0000FF]That was quite possibly the most juvenile
thing I seen in some time.[/color]
[color=#FF0000]It worked. She won't be blowing another engine
tonight.[/color]
[color=#0000FF]We're on a boat..... where
was she going to go?[/color]
[color=#FF0000]You'ld be surprised. But don't worry your pretty little head. It's
taken care of. YO! Zipper.[/color]
::Zipper flies over. bock's hands
the fly a C-note::
[color=#FF0000]Thanks, Bro. Couldn't have done it without you.[/color]
::Zipper accepts the payoff and buzzes off with excitement.
Foxglove cocks her head and stares down bock's::
[color=#0000FF]What was that all about?[/color]
[color=#FF0000]Just a little bit of fun.[/color]
::bock's pulls out his Ruger and
opens the loading bay. Rotating the cylinder, the cartridges fall out one by
one into his hand::
[color=#FF0000]Blanks.[/color]
[color=#0000FF]But..... I saw your
tire go flat![/color]
[color=#FF0000]Zipper loosened the valve stem while Lawhiney wasn't looking. I cleared everything with Indy
earlier. Pretty slick, huh?[/color]
::Foxglove smiles coyly at bock's::
[color=#0000FF]You let Evil bock's out tonight, didn't you?[/color]
[color=#FF0000]You know it, babe! He deserved a chance to get
some exercise. [/color]
[color=#0000FF]Well, don't let him stray too far. Oh..... looks like you're on![/color]
[color=#FF0000]Oh, crud! Later.[/color]
::bock's makes his way once again to the podium::
[color=#FF0000]Hi everyone! Didja
miss me? Too bad.[/color]
[color=#FF0000]At this time, it is my honor and privelege to present the award to this year's best poet.
There is no lack of talent among the members of the Cafe. Among us, some
express this talent in verse. Whether it is expressed as Haiku, comic doggerel,
or epic,.... poetry has the ability to fascinate a
broad spectrum of tastes. As a past winner of this award, I take special
pleasure in awarding this year's winner. So without further ado, the winner for
"Best Poet, 2008", is...Bubbles’ Big Brother![/color]
::The brown, furry aardvark, dressed in his finest top hat
and tails, known as Bubbles’ Big Brother and his finance’ Joanie were seated
next to each other, with their special guests from Poke seated on either side
of them. One was the alien scientist Davros and the
other was one of his cyborg creations, the giant
construct known as the Dalek Emperor::
Dalek Emperor: He called your name! Rise! Rise and
accept your award!
Joanie: Congratulations, baby.
Davros: Excellent, BBB! You have conquered! You have
crushed the opposition into powder! You have exterminated the competition!
::A chorus of ‘Exterminate!’ rose up from the mass of Daleks seated on the row behind them. BBB, however, never
moved::
Joanie: Honey? Are you okay?
BBB: Oh, I’m fine.
Joanie: Then why aren’t you going up to get your award?
BBB: Wait a minute! You mean, I actually won?
Joanie: Of course you did! They just announced it.
BBB: I know, but I thought it was another one of my insane delusions.
bock’s Car (on stage): Uh, BBB, I know this is your
moment, but we don’t have all night.
::BBB at once hopped up from his seat and began
hurrying towards the podium::
BBB: I’m coming! Sorry, but you know, I have people give me stuff all the time
and it turns out to be only in my head. That incident where I thought the Rocketeer gave me his jetpack was really embarrassing, to
say nothing of painful. I still can’t believe I survived that two story drop.
::BBB walks onto the podium where Bock’s Car presents
him with coveted Golden Acorn Award for Best Poet. BBB clasps it to his chest,
as a tear rolls down his eye::
BBB: This is the happiest moment of my life!
::He is interrupted by a loud, throat clearing from
the audience. Quickly the skewered mind of the aardvark races to save himself. He smiles and looks toward his finance::
BBB: That is, next to the day you agreed to marry me, sugar lump.
::BBB turns and looks nervously out at the crowd::
BBB: Did I mention that I’m dedicating this win to Joanie, who is my
inspiration in all things?
::Out in the audience, Joanie smiles at him. The
aardvark breathes a sight of relief::
BBB: In all seriousness though, you have no idea how honored I am to receive
this award. When I was growing up, my mother was a professional teacher. She
had dreamed of being a teacher all her life, and she gave up that career to
home school my siblings and me because she was disappointed that the schools in
her area were dumbing down the curriculums to improve
their grade point average.
One of the classes she taught us was poetry. Every two weeks
we’d have to memorize a new poem to help with our memory skills. That one class
impacted me more than just about anything I can think of. I have since become a
published poet, a seldom published poet it’s true, but
a published poet nonetheless. I want to thank my parents for the financial
sacrifices they had to make, not only in my mother giving up her paying job,
but for all expenses that home schooling brought. I would equally like to thank
the members of the Café who considered by meager submissions as worthy of this
august award. I am truly honored.
::The crowd begins to applaud as BBB returns to his
seat. As he does, he finds Davros wiping away tears
from his eyes::
Davros: That was touching. I haven’t been this happy
since the last time I nearly destroyed the entire universe.
BBB: Me neither, Davros. Me neither.
::bock's waves
to the crowd and leaves the stage::