Best Black and White (Greyscale) Image

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Mayhem strides out onto the stage to the strains of Michael Jackson's "Black or White". He casts his eyes upwards with a bemused look upon reaching the podium as the music then quickly dies away.

 

Mayhem: Hah hah, very appropriate. Just before he went from black to white...

 

A moderate amount of chuckling emanates from the crowd in response.

 

Mayhem: Anyhow, it's good to be back at the Golden Acorn Awards even though I voted for the other ship. Hey, can't belie my roots now, can I? And no casino either, I always look forward to making some money. Though seriously kids, don't try that at home! Got to have the parental advisory notice in there.

 

He smirks and peers out across the assembled audience, scanning from left to right.

 

Mayhem: Do we have any children in the audience? Hmm... plenty it seems, all masquerading as adults. How appropriate.

 

Before the watching sitted can respond, he continues on with the train of thought.

 

Mayhem: But face it, we are still in love with a twenty year old Disney cartoon which is the primary reason for us all being here in the first place. Just one reason though.

 

He looks across and down, then winks towards Gadget sitting in the audience.

 

Mayhem: Animation isn't just for kids of course. That much is... well, black and white really. Which brings me finally to the subject at hand, the Best Black and White Image of the year. Plenty of excellent entrants this year, including one or two, how shall we say, personal favourite requests in the mix. And so the nominations are:

 

Gadget in her Workshop by Trash

Poor Chip by KomandoRR

Dale on IA by HawkeyeNFO

Gadget [Windy Day] by Junker

Tammy's Portrait by DeLTa

Munks and Roses by Saraggle

 

Mayhem: Oh isn't this exciting and we've barely got started! Hmm, something wrong here...

 

He bends down to his left leg and straightens up again. A small knife is visible in his left hand, prompting a few small gasps from the audience members who can see it.

 

Mayhem: I think they put too much glue on this envelope, gonna have to slice her open!

 

He flips the knife about in his hand and drags it through and across the envelope in one swift motion, dissecting the two sides as he then tries to extract the card within. With the knife now partially covered in sticky residue, he wipes it off on the outside of the envelope before replacing from whence it came.

 

Mayhem: Okay, I think we're finally there... give this a wipe... and the winner is...by a landslide, Trash!

 

::Trash walks up on stage again::

 

Trash: Wow, if I keep this up, I will know my way there and back blindfolded!

 

::The audience laughs::

 

Trash: Thank you, one and all. What can I say that I did not two minutes ago? Well, nothing. Itís still the best picture Iíve done, and now we have more evidence.

 

::More laughter::

 

Trash: Thank you all again, and Rescue Rangers, away!

 

::Trash leaves to yet more applause. Remaining on stage, Mayhem watches the winner exit and head back to their seat::