::Fat Cat was never known for his patience, and for the last hour he'd been threatening to claw something or someone up while he waited for news from his spies. The Goon Squad in particular was happy when they finally showed up::
Fat Cat: The trophy, did you get it?
Boris: Eh, not exactly yet.
::Fat Cat lowered his voice to a threatening level::
Fat Cat: What do you mean, 'not exactly yet'?
Natasha: We met moose and squirrel... oh wait, wrong cartoon. We met wolf and rabbit. They drew the attention of the guards. We'll have to wait.
Boris: We also met two boars.
Fat Cat: I've got four bores right here--no more excuses. You're being paid well to nab that trophy for me, and I want it now!
Boris: It was better working for Fearless Leader than this walking furball.
Natasha: Don't worry, dahling. We'll get your trophy or our names aren't Frank and Doris.
IndyFE2a: Fat: But...your names aren't Frank and Doris...
Boris: Well, that's what you get for what you're paying us. Let's go Natasha, we'll try to get that that trophy anyway.
::Fat Cat watched them go::
Fat Cat: I have a feeling I'm going to regret this. Let's go up into the balcony and watch this little melodrama…
----------------------------------
::Back on the inside of Peterhof, Spigot and Dunder were sharing their own regrets. Notably, Spigot was starting to get desperate::
Spigot: Look at the big screen in the auditorium! The Lifetime Achievement award's next, and we still don't have anything to give to the High Marshal. What'll we do?
Dunder: Maybe if we beg and plead with the people running the show, they'll give us the trophy.
Spigot: Beg? I am Colonel Spigot, the Terror of Transapon, the Warrior of
Dunder: The soon to be shot Colonel?
Spigot: Good point. Good thing I got an "A" in Groveling...
::The two Thembrians head backstage, looking for the show's coordinator. They nearly reach him when Dunder points out something::
Dunder: Hey look, they've already got the big award on a rolling display cart. That's smart--that thing looks way to heavy to move otherwise...
Spigot: We can cut one of these ropes, lowering the curtain, then have dozens of Thembrian commandos rush in guns blazing, if they were allowed to have bullets, they could just hold their fingers up and make gun noises. I'll grab the award and carry it back to the High Marshal, and by my carrying it, I mean you carrying it, of course.
Dunder: Why not just roll it out that exit over there while nobody's looking?
Spigot: They how will all these people from around the world see my brilliant plan in action.
Dunder: And where are you going to get dozens of Thembrian commandos, it's just us.
Spigot: Details, details. We could just knock those presenters out and steal their uniforms. I'll get the one in the leather jacket and hat and you get the one with the tacky Hawaiian shirt.
Dunder: I don't think they'll fit, sir.
Spigot: Rats, I think I'd look dashing in that hat of his. I, meaning you, could swing on one of those ropes Tarzan-style and snatch the award right out of the winner's hands!
Dunder: I never learned to rope-swing, sir.
::While Spigot fretted over how to impress the world and get away with the trophy at the same time, Boris and Natasha were a little space behind them, watching::
Boris: Now, when stupid boars make their move, we make ours.
Natasha: But dahling, what if they get away with trophy?
Boris: They have less chance of that than of you or I winning for Best Fanfic.
Natasha: You follow awards?
Boris: Every year. Is a good hobby.
Natasha: Look!
::As they looked, Spigot and Dunder made their move. As Spigot gave out of the orders, Dunder grabbed the handle on the rolling platform that held the big award and started to pull. Boris and Natasha ran toward Dunder and grabbed the handle too::
Dunder: Hey, find your own trophy to replace!
Boris: No, is ours.
Spigot: Ours!
Boris: Ours!
::The Rangers were back together and with nothing more happening they decided to cool it backstage::
Monty:
Chip: Why's that? Too cold for you here?
Monty: Its' not that. Has more ta do with an old witch named Baba Yaga and a thousand year old wedge of cheese I... "borrowed" from her walkin' cottage.
Dale: Sounds like someone I'd rather not meet.
Gadget (gasping): Look!
::The struggle for the trophy continued for a few more moments, then they heard the sound of childlike laughter approaching::
Natasha: Oh no...
Spigot: Not...
Boris: Again!
::Yes, it was Zayats, the rabbit. With speed to burn, the rabbit leaped through the air and landed on the rolling platform. The bad guys had ducked, also letting loose of the handle. The platform starting rolling toward the stage::
Chip: We have to stop them, the safety of everyone on stage is most important!
Dale: Dude, this is gonna be sooo cool.
Fat Cat (from the balcony): My award!
Mole (ditto): My candybars!
Mepps (ditto): My fish!
Snout (ditto): My Russian nesting dolls!
Wart (ditto): What? I wasn't paying attention.
::Then, as if from nowhere, a wolf appeared::
Volk: Zayats!
::The wolf ran at the rolling platform, but Zayats jumped off. With a bang, the wolf hit it and caused the platform to roll back the other way--right toward the pursuing bad guys. All they could do was shout in frustration as the wheeled platform knocked them all down::
Wolf: NU POGODI!!! <[i]I'LL GET YOU!!![/i]>
::And with that, the wolf bounded away. But the Rangers and security guards were more than happy with what he'd left behind::
Chip: That wolf is a hero! He saved the day!
Dale: So why was he shouting about a new pagoda?
Monty: All right, you criminals, time for some hero like moping up!
::Monty dove into the pile fists up and Boris and Natasha ran for it::
Boris: He who spies and runs away...
::Sergeant Dunder and Spigot weren't quite as lucky. They tried to run, but ran into an obstacle known as the Thembrian High Marshal::
HM: Nozzle, explain yourself.
Spigot: Um, that's Spigot, sir. As for explanations, I'm three foot four, and I weigh sixty-nine pounds. I like turnip flavored ice cream. I'm frightened by clowns. I prefer my eggs sunny side down. Some times I sneak out to Louie's place and disguise myself as an Elvis impersonator. I have a fanatical devotion to the motherland, the fatherland and all the little children's lands too. And I'm fanatically devoted to myself also. I prefer women whose tusks are angled in towards their nose rather than those whose tusks are straight out or angled outward. My favorite book is "The Grand High Marshal's Guide to Joy and Affirmations for Success and Love—Or You Will Be Shot".
HM: Very funny. Why did you pretend to be me and take my invitations? My gorgeous wife and myself were nearly turned away at door to ceremony. If not for friendly ceremony environment, I would have you shot.
Spigot: We both are very grateful you high marshal and Mrs High Marshal are in such a great mood. Uh, we were trying to...
::He elbows Dunder::
Dunder (saluting): We were trying to replace your bowling trophy which we accidentally broke while cleaning your office, sir.
HM: Bowling trophy? Oh, that old thing. I was meaning to throw that away but kept forgetting.
::Spigot's jaw dropped, then he quickly tried to cover::
Spigot: Of course! I've preemptively disposed of it for you, as I am a loyal servant of Thembria and to the High Marshal and his lovely wife!
Dunder (to Spigot): So what part of your sitting in the High Marshal's chair saying how you should be the High Marshal was part of that, sir?
::Spigot glared at Dunder and started to run when the High Marshal plucked him up into the air::
HM: Oh, so you like playing High Marshal, eh? Well, we have some special plans for you, Nozzle.
Spigot: Uh, that's Spigot, sir...
HM: You can clean my office twice a week from now on, when not cleaning the rest of the building.
::Spigot nearly fainted::
HM: For now, be coming with us. I do not want to miss the end of great Awards show.
::Meanwhile, high up on a balcony, Fat Cat and his cronies watched as the Rangers restored order to the Awards::
Fat Cat: I should've known better than to hire my work done.
Mepps: Yeah, think of the money you could have saved by letting us mess things up for free.
Wart: What'll we do now, boss?
::Fat Cat sighed and sat down::
Fat Cat: Might as well watch the rest of it. Then I can start plotting for next year...
Wart: Why don't you try writing some fanfiction or something?
Mole: Oh, I am! I wrote a story called, "Gadget and the
Mepps: I wrote a story about the Rangers and an original character named Mary Sue who joins the group...
Snout: I made a picture of them visiting here in Peterhof. I bet the Russian community will vote for it...
Fat Cat: Why do I even bother...
----------------------------------------------
::With the crooks taken care of, the Rangers were able to relax and watch the rest of the show::
Gadget: Have any of you seen Wallace? I was talking to him a
little while ago and he just seem to vanish when I
turned around for a minute.
Chip: What did he say?
Gadget: Oh Chip, you should've heard! He said he has no real idea how he does what he does. It's almost like something spontaneous and it just seems to work! Isn't that wonderful!?!
Chip: Wonderful…
::Meanwhile, Dale watched near the exit door to make sure no more bad guys showed up. Then someone whistled lightly to him. It came from the trash dumpster::
Dale: Oh, hi Wallace!
Wallace (whispering): Quiet…
Dale: Say, uh, Gadget's been looking for you, and…
Wallace (whispering): I know, keep your voice down! She won't leave me alone. Just keeps asking me questions about how I invent things and then rattles of facts and figures I don't understand and I nearly want to faint and—
Dale: Oh, I've been there. So, you want me to cover for you while you make your escape?
Wallace: That would be wonderful. Gadget's nice, but she's just too…Gadget. I've got my spaceship parked over by one of the fountains. Just make sure she's not looking this way and I'll always be in your debt!
Dale: No problem!
::Dale salutes and heads over to Gadget, making sure she's facing away from Wallace, who promptly leaves::
Gadget: Dale, have you seen Wallace?
Dale: Uh, yep. Saw him a minute ago.
Gadget: You DID? Where is he?
Dale: Aw, sorry Gadget. He said he had to go home.
Gadget: HOME? But I wanted to ask him about…oh well, I can always e-mail him…
Chip (relieved): Come on, Gadget. Let's watch the last of the ceremony.
Gadget: Right you are!