::Orchestra plays some intro
Announcer: And now the award for Best All Time Fanfic... Pupspals!
walks out on stage wearing jeans & a Hellboy
Animated T-shirt. Music dies down. Pupspals
starts to talk but is interrupted by a drum solo. Everyone looks to see
Dale going at the drum set with everything he's got::
Orchestra members: DALE!
::Drumming stops. Dale hits the cymbal unenthusiastically one last time, puts the sticks down, crawls out of the orchestra pit & returns to his seat.::
Pupspals: Thank you. Well, as you can see, I was in a hurry & didn't quite get ready clothing wise for this. But let's be honest, we're all at home on our computers anyway, right? No one is actually at the theatre in Peterhof...
::Quick Flash to: At the ticket
Window of (insert names of where the acorn awards are this year) stands a
newbie lurker of the Cafe. He pounds away on ledge of the window.
Manager: (says something in Russian)
Translator: He says we don't know what you are talking
Newbie Lurker: But the awards are here tonight!
See? (points to his web enabled cell phone) most of
the awards have already been given out! I'm late! LET ME IN!!!
Translator: (translates to Russian)
The manager just shakes his head no::
::Quick Flash back to the awards:
Pupspals: So the All-Time best? Can there really be such a thing? I'm sure Gadget would argue that since Fanfiction hasn't stopped & hopefully never will, that it is impossible to truly have the all-time best. This isn't even considering that tastes and writing styles change over time. And can dramas compete against comedies and such?
notices Gadget starting to ponder this in the audience. Chip motions for her to
move it along...::
Pupspals: ...uh.... so let's just call this a "best of" list & move on! The nominees are:
::She grabs a list of nominees::
Gadget in Chains - Loneheart
::People applaud & cheer::
May Day Mayday - Dave White
Gadget's Hicups - Greyhound Bus
::More applause. Pupspals does a double take at the list. She squints
a couple of times & turns to Dr. Indy off stage::
Pupspals: are you sure??
::Dr Indy nods.::
Pupspals: Okaaaayyy.... I'll take any just about award you give
me, but I doubt this is all-time best!
Dr. Indy: It got at least one vote for it.
Pupspals: It did? IT DID?!? Oh, who was it! I've got to know!
Dr. Indy: Get used to disappointment.
Pupspals (frowning): Aw, okay…
::She looks out at Greyhound in the audience::
Pupspals: Not to knock your idea at all... I just know in retrospect my writing could've been better. And I've spotted typos & stuff - But anyway... Other nominees are:
Pupspals: The Ranger that Never
Was - Dr. Indy
:: Pupspals gestures off stage to
Dr. Indy while the audience applauds::
Pupspals: On a Wingut
and a Prayer - Stainless Steel Rat
Pupspals: A Bat and a Chipmunk - Lightindark76
Pupspals: The Lost Ranger – UrthQuake
Pupspals: Previous winner: Rhyme & Reason - Michael Demcio
:: cheers & applause::
Pupspals: And Previous
winner, the graphic novel: Of Mice & Mayhem - Fish!
:: cheers & applause::
:: Pupspals takes an envelope out
of her jeans pocket::
Pupspals: And the winner is......
Dale: FISH, FISH, FISH!
Pupspals: Not until I read it! The winner is Rhyme and Reason AND Of Mice and Mayhem!
::Fish comes up on stage::
Fish: Well of course I deserve it! I rule! Bow down to MEEEEE!
::The audience laughs, until Security tackles and cuffs what turns out to be an imposter and leads him offstage, presumably for a nice cup of tea and a beating. "Fish in Chains" novel narrowly avoided. Fish crawls up onstage from orchestra pit with a black eye and duct tape across his mouth::
Fish: Mmmpphhh--rrmmpp-- hldonasecnd,,,(RIPPPPP) Ow. Uhh-- anyway-- thank you --- I can't believe this. I don't deserve it! I don't rule and please no bowing-- it makes me feel like I'm in "Lion King" or something.
::After everyone's calmed down, the untied Fish continues::
Fish: Thank you, everyone-- I am so happy that I created something that made such a lasting impression on my goal demographic- true fans of the Rescue Ranger mythos. I love you all!! Now- anybody got a steak for my eye? How about a nice poached salmon? Curly fries?
Pupspals: Unfortunately, Mike Demcio couldn't make it tonight, but he passes along his good wishes and thanks.
::The crowd stands and cheers as Fish leaves with his award and. Pupspals walks off, wondering if she can write off this trip on her taxes::