::A spotlight rains down on stage left as Canina La Fur
enters. The star of stage, screen and an occasional dog food commercial nods
appreciatively as she makes for the podium::
Canina: I’m so pleased to be here with all you kind people. You’ve been having
these awards now for years, and years, and years…
::The audience laughs at the inside joke, and Canina
continues::
Canina: Being a dog who had a return engagement on the Rangers’ show, I can
appreciate the value of this award. Writing about returning characters takes a
greater skill and talent, which is also something I know a lot about. Now,
let’s see who’s our nominees…
Gadget in “Gadget's Skirt”, Pupspals
Rat Capone in “Gadget's Quest”, Kevin Sharbaugh
Chip in “Theo’s Origin”, Indy and Chris Silva
Gadget in “Gadget's Quest”, Kevin Sharbaugh
Dale in “Dale the Detective: Case of the Nabbed Necklace”, Indy and Chris Silva
Canina: Wonderful! Now, where’s Mortimer with that envelope…
Monty:
::Monty comes out, handing the envelope to her::
Canina: Thanks, Montmercy.
::The big Aussie sighs and returns offstage while Canina
opens the envelope::
Canina: And now, the winner for Recurring Series Character is…oh, two of them!
Rat Capone in “Gadget’s Quest”—that’s KS—and Dale in “Dale the Detective”—that’s
Indy and Chris!
::To the courteous applause of the audience, Rat Capone and
his ever loyal flunkies, Arnold Mousenegger and Sugar Ray Lizard, take the
stage. Arriving at the podium, Capone's goons took up position on either
side, ever vigilant for any sign of danger aimed at their boss... whose hat was
only barely visible over the top of the podium. The diminutive gangster
shouted an order to the taller of the two lackeys in his distinctive raspy
voice::
Capone: Get down here, stupid!
Mousenegger: Oh, sure thing, boss!
::With the behemoth of a rodent on all fours behind the podium, Capone climbed
upon his back. Now able to see over the podium, he clutched his award::
Capone: Now that's more like it! Finally, a little respect! After
all the years of directing incompetent goons to do the hard work for me, all
the cement and piano wire, all the rivals I had wha- I mean, bought out... with
my superior business skills. Yeah, business skills, that's it. Now,
I'd stay and continue to let youse all bask in my glory, but I and my
companions have to help a friend of mine moves some furniture into his
apartment... Ain't that right, Sugar Ray?"
Sugar Ray: Oh! Right! He's got lots of furniture, so we'll be busy
all night. Won't have much time to do much else.
Mousenegger: Yeah! We certainly won't have time to rob the bank at
Twelfth and
Capone: Quiet, ya' lunk head!
::Capone promptly konks his 'stool' on the head with his award. Then,
with an 'ow', the animate piece of furniture rose to it's feet clutching it's
head causing Capone to take a nasty spill... right into Sugar Ray::
::As the vertically challenged mobster drug his dopy deputy off the stage, his
more competent companion following along, Chip leaned over to Dale::
Chip: Y'know, there's something wrong with that story about moving furniture.
Dale: Yeah. Since when did Rat Capone ever have a friend? Now ‘scuze me,
it’s my turn!
::Indy, Chris and Dale head onstage, where Dale takes hold of the award first, trying to drag it off::
Indy: Whoa now! Hold on, there, Dale. We were the ones who wrote it, remember?
Dale: Yeah, but it was about me! You made me too dumb in
that story, like the writers did in "Pied Piper Power Play"! Moonwalk
Indy: Oh now, I think it was cute.
Chris: I agree, we wrote him too dumb.
Dale: See? But everyone knows I'm a genius anyways, because it takes someone of my acting prowess to play someone that dumb and yet be entertaining too!
Indy: Well, you may have a point, but still the story was meant to be somewhat tongue-in-cheek and--
::A loud "Ahem!" at this point from Dr. Batorious offstage broke the three of them out of their argument::
Indy: Oh, and we're really glad to be getting this award!
Chris: Yes. Even if he was played too dumb.
Indy: Was not.
Chris: Was too!
Indy: Was not.
Chris: Was too!
Indy: Was not!
Chris and Dale: <i>Was too</i>!
::Indy rolls his eyes and heads off stage, followed by the still-insistent Chris and Dale. Canina blows kisses as she tap-dances offstage::