::Dale runs out on stage in a clown outfit::

Dale: Waka-waka-waka!

 

Fozzie Bear (in the audience): Hey, that’s my line!

 

Dale: Aw, c’mon! Funny guys do imitations you know!

 

Fozzie: Yeah, and that imitation was nowhere near funny!

 

::The audience laughs and a bemused Dale takes the podium but puts it back, taking off the clown outfit to reveal his tux underneath::

 

Dale: Hiya, everyone! Best Comedy is my favorite category, because fun stuff’s what makes life great! Take George Burns, Milton Bearle, Jack Benny, Steven Wright. Take my wife—please!

 

::The audience laughs a little, but then Foxglove flies up on stage::

Foxglove: You have a wife?

 

Dale: No Foxglove, it’s just part of—

 

Foxglove: You do! Youdoyoudoyoudo! You’re a married munk and you’ve been flirting with me! I oughta flatten you!

 

Dale: NO! Foxy, you don’t understand, it’s—

 

::Foxglove hauls back to slap him to Kingdom Come, and then kisses him on the nose::

 

Foxglove: Gotcha, cutie.

 

::Dale is caught, flabbergasted. The audience doubles over with laughter as Foxglove takes her bows and flaps back down into the audience. Dale collects himself and faces the audience again::

 

Dale: Um, as I was saying…tonight I’m awarding Best Comedy. I think we’d better get to the nominees before it gets any weirder:

 

- “The Case of the Kitnapped Kat”, lotacats

- “Away from it All”, Stitch

 

::Dale brightens up again::

Dale: Oh boy, those were great! But how can you pick one of them to win? Oh yeah, you voted and all. Let’s see who won!

 

::Dale rips open the envelope::

 

Dale: And the winner for Best Comedy is—a tie! All right, both of them win!

 

::Lotacats comes up first, looking totally lost in the moment and surprised::

 

Lotacats: Dale will accept the award....with thanx...short and sweet.

 

````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

***~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~***

 

~*~Dale accepts award due to role of “Picked Upon”...and then being the ultimate Hero.~*~

 

***~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~****

 

Dale: It has been a long journey to this moment.....very long as in another, alternate world.  I have critically evaluated the meaning this will have to my life.

 

::Dale thinks out loud, muttering, “How do this in 20 words or more...”

 

Dale: This shows I can take it on the chin when the writers pick on me as unmercifully as this one does. She needs help. It may take some time....but....oh, gosh!! This is a trememdous moment right now!!

 

::Dale looks up, strumming his fingers on the podium::

 

Dale: I wonder if some Haikus would thoughtfully express my gratitude.  No???

Ummm.....

 

::Fat Cat comes back out on stage, obviously having lost his patience::

 

Fat Cat: Here’s the award. Take it!

 

::Dale moves closer to the podium::

 

Fat Cat: Try not to speak. Take the award. Leave the stage. And no Haikus!

 

Dale: But…

 

::Dale protests as he’s hustled offstage::

 

Dale: They told me to come up with a speech...

 

::Lotacats waves to the audience as she takes her award and heads off. A moment later, a furry brown otter named Stitch approaches the microphone and taps it with
a clawtip::

 

Stitch: *Ahem!* Thank you one and all for this Golden Acorn, which I’m told contains real chocolate inside.

 

::The crowd laughs and he continues::

 

Stitch: I’m tremendously pleased that my very first fanfic has won an award, and while I never really saw it as a comedy myself, it’s an honor to know that it was enjoyed and appreciated by so many fellow Rangerphiles. I am both humbled and encouraged, and for that also you have my heartfelt thanks.

 

::Stitch takes his award and heads offstage, while Dale attempts to get back onstage to give a speech. Fat Cat pulls him back, and mentions something about the dessert tray in the break room. They two candy lovers head off together::