::Dr. Batorious, a bespectacled and slightly graying bat, comes out on stage. Everyone expects him to read an announcement, but instead he takes the podium. His deep voice reverberates throughout the place::
Dr. Batorious: I’m not here to announce a break, but to give out the next award. As the narrator of this ceremony, I have a deep appreciation for narrative description in stories. It’s true that character interaction is important to a successful story, but without quality narration it’s difficult to picture what’s happening. So tonight we honor the best pieces of narrative description. They include:
- Journey to Itsalotabotha, "A Dream for the Ages"
- Description of limbo, "A Dream for the Ages"
- Jareth’s description of Darien, "The Return of Winifred"
::Dr. Batorious takes the envelope::
Dr. Batorious: And now, to name the winner…it’s Jareth for his description of Darien in “The Return of Winifred”!
::The audience cheers for about a minute, but the applause begins to die down when nobody walks on stage to accept the award. Mumbling amongst the crowd ensues::
::Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, <a href=“http://www.acme-labs.com/cgi-bin/acorncafe/bio.cgi?dominiquethecyclops”>Dominique the Cyclops</a> appears onstage, dressed in her high-collar trench coat and wide-brim hat. In her hand, she is clutching a piece of paper::
::The audience applauds again::
Dominique (tipping her hat): Thank you.
::Applause dies down::
Dominique: As you can see, Jareth is currently not present, so I will be reading his Narrative Description for him.
::Pauses for a moment, tapping her foot::
Dominique (slightly annoyed): Don’t I get some music? Pretty much everyone else has.
::<a href=“http://mpu.static.net:7664/Trigun/trigun%20-%20Perfect%20Night.mp3”>Perfect Night</a> begins playing::
Dominique: There, that’s better. Now then…
:: Dominique lifts up the piece of paper in her hand, squinting at it, trying to make out what it says::
Dominique (mumbling to herself): It’s so hard to see with only one eye…
::Her eye patch opens, revealing her red/yellow <a href=“http://www.quiklens.com/images/products/W1005.jpg”>Demon’s eye</a>)::
Dominique: That’s better. Now, for those of you who haven’t read TROW yet, this scene takes place about two thirds of the way through the story, right before (NAME DISCLOSED DUE TO SPOILER) is forced into fighting with a magically enhanced Darien. I’d just like to make it clear that Darien becomes this way for a very good reason, and not because of “magical Mary-Sue powers”®. *ahem*
::She begins to read the Narrative Description::
Dominique: “…Gone was the small Red Pack Fox, who hated humanity with such a passion. In his place, stood what only now only remotely resembled a fox. Darien still had the build of a fox, only now he had grown to the size of a large tiger, equipped with razor sharp teeth, resembling that of a wolf’s. His orange fur had now become a shimmering silver, and his white fur had become as black as night. Not only this, but he now supported not one, but seven tails, all of which were casually moving together behind him in a wave-like pattern. Darien opened his eyes, which were now glowing a bright red. They were like Jamba’s, only Darien’s eyes possessed dark red pupils in their centers…”
Dominique (after pausing a moment): Again, I urge anyone who hasn’t read TROW to do so. It can be found on Zanzibar’s site.
::She puts the paper down, breathes a huge sigh or relief, and waits for applause…silence::
Dominique: What is wrong with you people? Are you…
::She stops when she notices that not only is everyone silent, but motionless as well. It is now that she remembers that her Demon’s eye has been open during her entire reading of Jareth’s speech::
Dominique: Oh for the love of— I can’t believe I left this thing open the entire time!
::She angrily steps over to Dr. Batorious, snatches the award from his wing, and storms off the stage. Several seconds later, the crowd unfreezes. To them, it appears Dominique vanished right after saying “It’s so hard to see with only one eye…” Scattered applause ensues, as no one is really sure whether or not the presentation is over::
-::Somewhere, in a land, one step removed from reality…::-
Jareth (somewhere in <a href=“http://www.astrolog.org/labyrnth/snap/maze1.jpg”>the labyrinth</a>, cane in hand): There. Consider yourself lucky I’m in a rush.
Fallen chicken: *weak cluck*
Jareth: Now then, now that I finally have my cane, I can go…wait.
::Jareth feels around his neck for his <a href=“http://oddpla.net/jareth/sights/outfits/symbol.jpg”>pendant</a>, only to discover it’s not there::
Jareth (yelling into the sky): <I><B>Censored</B></I>
::Back in reality, Dr. Batorious shrugs and walks offstage, nodding to the audience before he does::