::The music to “Law & Order” continues as a pretty red fox trots onto the stage, a strange-looking old bird perched on her back. It’s Mack JaCroix and Michelle Carabi, the two animal prosecutors from Rennod’s “Claw & Antler: Small Animals Unit” story. The audience is dead silent as they both approach the podium, where the falcon takes a perch next to the microphone and begins to speak::
Mack (sternly): Ladies and gentlemen, THIS IS A CRIME!
::Nervous whispers break out as this sinks into the audience. The fox’s eyes widen::
Michelle: Um, Mack...
Mack (outraged): And I’m dead set on rectifying this.
::The nervous whispers become conversations in volume::
Michelle: Mack, what are you doing?
Mack (still stern): It’s criminal because...
::The fox looks around nervously, as if wondering when the mass panic is going to start and the audience will either flee in panic or storm the stage in anger::
Mack (normal voice): Something like this should have been done a long time ago!
::The audience breathes a huge collective sigh of relief and relaxes::
Michelle: (recovering her composure) Yes, that’s right Mack, it’s been far too long since all the talent of this community was recognized. And that’s what we’re here to do, to help recognize a formidable portion of that talent: the artwork produced by the Rangerphiles.
Mack: But all that wonderful art had to come from somewhere; what is art without an artist? And so here we are. We’re here to present the award for Best Artist.
Michelle: The nominees for Best Artist are:
Mack: (clears throat)
Michelle: Chip N’ Death.
Mack: An excellent anime artist.
Michelle: Ruslan Matvienko.
Mack: Is there anything the man can’t do?
Michelle: Charles Williams.
Mack: The Master of the Pencil Sketch.
Michelle: Fubar Fox.
Mack: An excellent line artist.
Michelle: Matt Plotecher.
Mack: How could such a multitalented artist not be included?
Michelle: Morgan Kohl.
Mack: His art has as much depth as his wonderful stories.
Michelle: Murad Ismailov.
Mack: Another fine artist from the great country of Russia.
Michelle: And Shelley “Dannycat” Pleger.
Mack: Brilliant color sketches.
Michelle: Quite a list, no?
Mack: Each and every one of them worthy of such an honor.
Michelle: But this year, we can select only one.
Mack: And that one is ...
::Michelle holds the envelope in her front paws, while Mack uses a talon to slit the envelope open::
Another Voice From the Back: Hey! Why couldn’t you have let me do that?
Voice From the Back: Because you’re a sparrow and he’s a falcon. Your claws aren’t sharp enough!
::Mack plucks the card from the envelope and holds it with his wings. He reads it::
Mack: The winner is...Charles Williams!
:: The crowd goes wild ::
Michelle: As Mr. Williams could not be here tonight, Chip and Dale will accept the award on his behalf and present him with it later.
::Chip and Dale walk onto the stage and accept the trophy, then exit the stage, followed by Mack and Michelle. The music to “Mack the Knife” plays::
Mack (fuming): Oooh! Not again!
::The fox stifles a giggle and tries to remain quiet and composed as they leave::