::From offstage, a dog barks, “Ruff, ruffruff
RUFF ruuuuff!”. Through the curtain, swinging on a
rope, comes a German Shepard in a superhero’s outfit. Right behind him is a
similarly-bedecked white bird. Flash the Wonder Dog and Conrad Cockatoo land
perfectly right next to the podium, and the crowd stands and cheers. Then
another Flash and Conrad come out, the real ones this time, and they shake
hands with their stunt doubles, who leave the stage::
Flash: Still can’t do my own stunts, folks!
::The crowd laughs a bit, but politely::
Flash: Conrad and I are pleased to be here to award—
::One of the Rangerphiles stands up and whistles, his arms
full of Flash the Wonderdog merchandise::
Flash (the Rangerphile): You tell ‘em, Flash! You da dog! YEAAAH!
Flash (the Wonderdog): Fans, gotta love ‘em. I’ll tend to signing your collectibles after the show. And now, the nominees for Best Characterization of the Rangers:
“A Fantasy General”, by Aivars Liepa
“Death of a Comedian”, by The J.A.M.
::Flash begins opening the envelope::
Flash: Anyone taking odds on who’ll win this one?
::The audience laughs, and several even point in the jaguar’s direction::
Flash: It’s The J.A.M., for “Death of a Comedian”!
::The J.A.M. and the audience get in on it this time::
¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!!
::The band plays “Somebody Love Me” again, as all the Rangers and The J.A.M. head for the stage::
Gadget: Golly! That’s four awards in a row that you’ve got, J.A.M.!”
J.A.M: You’re telling me!
Zipper: Yeah! And you really went VERY in depth with all of us, including Foxy!
Dale: But wasn’t I out of character through most of the story?
Monty: Well, you had a good reason, lad. And where you *were* in character. You were your ultimate self!
Chip: It was your moment of glory, Dale.
Foxy: And BOY did he get glory!
::Foxglove gives him a HUGE hug. While Dale strains to inhale again, the onça steps up to the mike::
J.A.M.: True characterisation not only involves knowing the characters like the back of your hand, it’s also important to, well, basically get inside their heads and keep track of their thought patterns. It’s exhausting, but as you can see, it’s well worth the effort. Thanks to Roy Neal Grissom again, for sending that videotape, where I could see all of you guys in ENGLISH and so get your characterisations correct. Thanks to Aivars Liepa, too, for ‘A Fantasy General’. And thanks to everyone for their vote! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO!!! ¡¡¡MEXICO…!!!
::The Rangers leave the podium, chanting along with the jaguar, and clear the stage. Flash and Conrad salute the crowd and leave to heavy applause. Something moves way up in the rafters…::